An Important Bro Summer Update: Drink Of The Summer

If you’re a Pal-level subscriber at Defector, you get access to a premium weekday newsletter called The Cipher, which has a recap of the blog day, links to other sites, and extra takes and bits from staffers. You can change your newsletter preferences or upgrade your subscription at the My Account page. Here, from the newsletter archives, is an important Bro Summer update from Kelsey.

You may have thought that the drink of Bro Summer was a light beer. This is a good thought. It is good to enter the bro mindset, to commune with brodom, to endeavor to find a way to make your life both simpler and better at once. But you would be wrong! When I first introduced Bro Summer, I included light beer in the list because light beer is important! It is crucial to being a bro. But to a bro, light beer is like water. You slurp it down without meaning or focus. What if it’s a special occasion? What if your other bro does something good and needs to celebrate? What if it’s the bro’s favorite day—Saturday—and you want something a little special? 

I’m happy to announce that the cocktail of Bro Summer is …

…

RANCH WATER! 

As a Texan, Ranch Water is my culture. We are not talking about the derivative trash ranch waters that are sold in cans (though we can also drink these), we are talking about making our bros a special little drink. The recipe is easy: You need nice blanco tequila, you need bubbly water (preferably Topo Chico) and you need a bunch of limes. All you do is put the juice from a whole lime in a cup, add a shot of tequila, add ice, and then fill with bubble water! Delicious! Easy! Congrats, bro! 

If you want to get fancy with it (this is not illegal for bros to do), you could add a little salt rim or a little Tajin rim. Anything good enough for thousands of ranch hands is good enough for us. Try it, bro! You deserve it! 

Thanks for your continued support of Defector. Be excellent down there.